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Seventh Son – AKA The Dude Fights a Dragon

We went to see Seventh Son, starring The Dude and The Dude’s Main Squeeze. (Oh yeah, and some young unknown who plays the actual 7th Son.) It was one of those movies based off a book/comic, in which the creators decide to provide absolutely no context. It played like a video game and felt very similar to Van Helsing, RIPD, John Carter, and Prince of Persia–three of which I actually really enjoyed. However, 7th Son desperately (and I can’t stress that enough) needed a narrator. Basically consider what Stardust would have been like if there had been no Ian McKellan voiceovers and how annoyingly confusing it would have been. Yeah, the opening of 7th Son was like that, minus some of the charm.

That being said, the middle was a lot of fun–great demon battles with good CG and very amusing Jeff Bridges lines. All told, it was a PG-13 adventure flick that is a good example of a hero’s journey for freshmen to study. As someone who likes context, I was annoyed that the ONLY characters in the piece were the kid and his family, demon hunters, and demons/witches, and the rest of the world went by completely unnoticed–kind of like in 47 Ronin. The romantic plot was mediocre but not awful. And **special added spoiler bonus** they killed Kit Harrington.

I was entertained and not bored, although I did roll my eyes a fair few times.

VERDICT: Worth seeing if you like the movies mentioned above, but NOT worth seeing in theaters.

I give it 4 out of 10 Ms if anyone’s counting, but I think I might be able to make it a lot more fun if I do a miss-labeled cast version of it like I did with The Prestige… Hmm.

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